Grocery Cart Confessional: Perfectionism is a Five-Letter Word

I bought P90X two months ago.

I did the routines for a total of two weeks. And then I quit. And then I quit exercising all together.

This might sound normal for some, but for me, it was a BIG deal. I have exercised at least four times per week for the last five years.

When I started P90X, I was so excited. I was ready for a challenge. I was ready to be strong. I was ready to “BRING IT”.

What I wasn’t ready for was the Chest and Back workout…I sucked at it.

And not just sucked. Like I could only do two or three of the military push ups or flying V things – while the beautiful actors were doing 25 or 30 of them.

And something inside of me clicked.  Since I couldn’t do the workouts as good as THEM, I wouldn’t do the workouts at all. And then another thing clicked. I thought if I was going to be a LOSER and not do P90X, I wouldn’t do anything at all.

And so I stopped. Doing anything. Because if I couldn’t keep up with the beautiful actors, why even try.

What an idiot!

I started working out again yesterday. I did my usual elliptical and some ab work. It wasn’t P90X, but it was something, and something was better that the NOTHING I had been doing. And it felt awesome.

And then I thought, how often does this kind of mentality impede me from living my life?

Unfortunately, more than I care to admit. Because I am a perfectionist.

Any of these ring a bell?

I won’t bring over a plate of cookies to my neighbors because the cookies aren’t perfect.

I won’t invite people over to my house because I think my house isn’t nice enough.

I don’t do a price book because I’m afraid I won’t have the lowest price listed.

I won’t do a budget because I know that I will break it.

I won’t try to make a new friend, because I’m afraid they will see how flawed I really am.

As we draw near to Christmas, and with it all the hustle and bustle, remember that you are enough.

Sure there will always be one more present, cookie, call, card, gift basket, or (insert anything here) you could make or do. But guess what – what you do is enough. It was enough for God to send his son to earth as the greatest gift. And by his GRACE, it was enough.

So my new word for my tilt toward perfectionism – GRACE.

Grace, that it is enough.